Change = Challenging Yourself

5 lbs by the end of the week!

Yup, that's my challenge for the week. So please don't freak out because 5 lbs. 5 lbs is all relative to your weight and physical fitness. And trust me on this one, my body is totally capable of the 5lbs and then some.

So, want to know the motivation behind the 5lbs?! Well my in laws are throwing a surprise 80th birthday party for our Grandma. And, I admit, I have not seen some of these people since Christmas. So you know that feeling when someone hasn't seen your progress in weight loss, and they ask if you have lost weight?! Or they notice a change of some sort and they actually verbalize it?! That right there my friend, is my motivation for this week.  

I also am going to plan for this success. Because failing to plan if planning to fail :) So I will come up with a good meal plan for the week and make sure to fit in at least my 3 exercises, and also I need to pack my week full again. Really having a busy week did wonders for me. It really gave me a new perspective on this journey to weight loss. And we all knew I needed that. 

So keep coming back for more updates. I am trying to talk myself into doing a before and after pic. It still seems so freaking scary to me right now. But it is all about the journey and making progress and SEEING the progress. One day I will be so bummed with myself if I don't. So stay tuned, I may or may not do a before and after pic? 

Do you do mini challenges?! 

Interested in doing a challenge with me!? Please, join me, so I am not alone :) 

XOXO

One Day at a Time

First off I know the majority of the world is STOKED that it is Friday! However, I am in class literally ALL day Saturdays. So Friday is like a Sunday for me. I am busy getting stuff together for the weekend, especially if it is busy, and getting my last minute cram studies in.

::insert boring sighhh::

But anywho. I have been doing decent with my journey to a new, healthy, fit me lately. Not counting that I have left over cookies from the bake sale that I just can't seem to keep my damn fingers out of. I have been taking it one day at a time. One meal choice at a time. Making the decision to exercise one day at a time. 

I have really been thinking about my goals. Not just goals for weight loss or fitness goals, but goals to become the better version of myself. I was overwhelmed. I have so many areas that I would like/need to make improvements on that it makes it very easy to just say the hell with it. 

 

I strive to be a better mom, to be a better wife, a better daughter of God, a better student, a better member of my community, to be a role model and inspiration of ANY kind to others, better with time management, a better sister, be better with self discipline, I mean literally the list can go on and on and on. Sometimes when I pray at night I literally fall asleep because my prayers are so long. That's because I turn to the Lord to confide and ask for the strength and ability to change the way HE wants me to change. He probably thinks, well there she goes again, snoring ;) 

 

 But like I have said, I have done a little thinking about it. And I can let myself go crazy thinking about how much needs to change, but really the answer is simple. Very simple. One. Day/decision. At. A. Time. So I am implementing that strategy starting NOW!

 

 So today I am going to literally take one decision at a time.

How do you talk yourself through change? 

Happy Weekend Yall. 

Weird. I just said Yall and I am from Michigan. Just go with it. 

XOXO

Inspiring Women

Over the past week I feel that I have made a hurdle over a hump that I was having which was eating out of boredom. It's a problem and has always been a problem of mine. Once again, I don't just sit around all day errraday but, I am in a routine and that can create some boredom for ME. I am a stay at home mom and clearly I have time to cook, which I enjoy doing. So whenever I am bored that is usually what I revert to do. I also am pursuing my dreams of becoming a nurse. So, I keep myself busy with my studies. But the issue with that is I need something to do with my hands while studying, which is usually when I turn to a snacky food.

I always had a problematic relationship with food.  I am convinced that I will always have a struggle with food. I eat to celebrate, I eat when I am down, I eat when I am bored, I eat when I am hungry, I eat when I study. I don't know how to make that relationship any better. But what I do know is that I need to find continuous inspiration. I think, for me anyways, the hardest part is STAYING motivated. I DEF know that getting back on track is super hard. Like almost impossible. But I feel that staying motivated has been impossible for me. I am not saying that it is NOT possible, but I am saying that I haven't found that road yet. So in the mean time, I look for inspiration. 

 Here is where I get inspiration from. 

Check out her blog

You HAVE to see her before and afters. It. blows. my. mind.



I just think that she is so inspiring! When I am having a hard day, I just go through and look at her before and afters. Isn't she like the cutest thing?! Go visit her and get some inspiration!

This is the other awesome lady that is such an inspiration. And she is funny as hell!

I introduce to you..... Mama Laughlin (in my best announcer dude voice)!!!




Wanna know something even more amazing?! That after pic needs to be updated because she is much more fit now. So, when you are done reading this AND Jessi's blog you must hop on over to her blog here.
However, it would not surprise me if you haven't already known about her. She is honestly amazing and SoOo inspiring. She really is the one that inspired me to start a blog. Love, love, LOVE her! It is like boarder line stalker status. So you must follow her if you haven't already.

It helps to know that I am not the only person in the world that has struggled with the weight. And it is uplifting to SEE others actually make the progress! SO if you need some inspiration head over there now. For real, NOW!

XOXO

Monday, ohh Monday

I made it! I made it through the weekend! It. was. a. busy. one. I put on my first mom2mom sale..ever. I was super excited, and a little nervous. It didn't go as good as I hoped/wanted it to go, but this is the first mom2mom event that was held in our community. I am hoping that every year it will grow bigger and bigger. There really just wasn't a lot of traffic. I had 25 tables set up, just not much traffic. I felt bad for the sellers. I was disappointed. I did learn a few things along the way that I would have done differently and there are somethings that I just didn't think about doing. But when you are chairing an event by yourself it is easy to miss somethings. So for next time then I know what I have down and I will know where to focus more on. 

I made roughly $150.00. Which isn't terrible. But, you should have seen my table. It was RIDIC! For real. Next time, I will only bring half as much as I brought this time. So with the money that I made I went to Target and bought my oldest a new car seat, well actually it is a booster seat. I now look in the back seat and seriously almost start crying! How did my baby grow so quickly?!?! I wish I had a remote to freeze time even if it's just for a little while. And since I was already at Target I couldn't resist looking through the clothes for my girls. I honestly can not help it! It is like my cart just naturally there. Their is no stopping it :)

I find that I dress my girls super cute. It's like I wish I could dress like that so I dress them in outfits that I wish I could wear. I so wish I could rock the leggings. But I can't right now. So my girls do. I wish I could wear the tunics without it making me look bigger, so my girls do. I wish I could wear the boots to my knees but I can't so my girls do. One day my friend, one day.

On a positive note, I felt super good about last week. Yes it was busy, sometimes too busy and it stressed me out at times. But I made a great stride with my eating. It is so motivating! I need to keep myself busy. I think that I am going to volunteer more within my community/church. It makes my soul feel so freaking good plus it doubles and helps me break this terrible relationship with food. 

What do you do to get out of your funks?

XOXO

Ekkkk

Well hey there beautiful! (I love it when someone says that to me, even if it isn't my husband, every girl likes to feel beautiful) Soo my week is literally FLYING by! Let me give ya a little update chera. I am on the board of a PTA and I signed up to chair a mom2mom sale, which just so happens to be THIS Saturday. Guys (yes, guys, I am from the north and everyone is refereed to as you guys) this is the FIRST event that I have EVER put on. I am so nervous and excited that my head could pop off my shoulders at any given second. :)

So not only am I running the event, I have a table to sell my items, AND I have another table to feature my Thirty One business. This is CRAZY! Seriously! I have been going non stop! I don't know exactly when this happened but I became a hoarder of infant clothing. I have 7 tubs, 7 storage tubs people, this is just ridiculous! LOTS with tags still on them. So I have been busy working on organizing them and pricing them. Plus doing the wifely/motherly duties, plus we through in another meeting for the PTA this week, plus I have been working on getting a sweet set up together for my Thirty One items. 

BUT, what I am the most excited about is the fact that I literally have not been consumed over food these past few days. And it feels exhilarating. I can already feel my body changing. I love love love it when I wake up and I feel smaller. It just puts such a pep in my step. :D 

So, I have just a few more days to get things in order. I can't wait to see how much I make off of the mom2mom sale. I never had a garage sale or done a sale of any kind (maybe I have always been a hoarder and my husband just recently pointed it out ;) ). I plan on taking the money that I make from the sale to turn around and get them a whole new wardrobe for the spring/summer and hit up all those awesome deals for the winter clothes. 

How is your week going?! 

XOXO

Bring it Monday

 

 Seriously! That is like the best quote to start the week off too, don't you agree?

 

I have a jam packed week ahead of me, and I honestly can not be more excited about it! Busy = not eating out of boredom. Yayy! It gives me such a boost of confidence when I find myself busy and not over eating out of boredom. I feel silly admitting it, because it makes it sound like I am this lazyy as hell girl. And while, yes, somedays I just want to sit on the couch with a blanket and watch whatever it is that I want to watch, I still make sure that the things that need to get done around our home is done. But ever since I quit my job and decided to be a stay at home mommy, I don't have that "schedule" or that busy-ness thing going on. When you work, you wake up, get ready, grab something to eat (maybe eat on the way to work), don't eat until it is lunch time, which is when you eat something healthy, then when you get out of work your evening if full of laundry, dinner, cleaning, running here and there, maybe running the kids to their events, and eating dinner, then to bed it is to get ready to do it all over again the next day. For me, this is what it looks like. Wake up, coffee 1st freakin' thing, make and eat breakfast with my girls, clean up, play with them, do some light cleaning and a little laundry, realize that you are bored because it is winter and there is nothing to freaaking do so I scan our food inventory and see what I can't make/bake/eat, then the girls are hungry again, so make and eat lunch with my girls, clean up from that, then lay them down for a nap, get some homework done, but this is when I feel like I need something to do with my hands so I grab a snack, then get sick of that so then I resort back to cleaning and/or preparing for that night's dinner, watch my FAVORITE soap Days of our Lives, the girls wake up, get them a snack and maybe eat a little then again too, play some more with the girls, clean up some more (kids make messes wayyy quicker than I can clean), hubby gets home from work, spend a little time together as a family, finish preparing dinner, eat, clean up, pack lunch (for my hubby) and make coffee for the next day, watch tv and play with the girls, maybe get some homework done, check facebook, read my daily blogs, check emails, get the girls ready for bed and then put them to bed, my hubby goes to bed early also because he has to wake up so early, then I am up  by myself which is when I eat SWEETS and work more on homework! So anyways, you get my point that I am trying to make right? I eat out of boredom, and it is out of control.

THIS is the week that I get myself BACK ON TRACK! Make the RIGHT choices, keep myself busy, PLAN things ahead of time, and HOLD MYSELF ACCOUNTABLE, and RELISH in the awesome feeling of being proud of myself for the SMALL accomplishments. 

 

I am going to kick this week in its teeth! :) 

XOXO

 

Motivation

Awww! I feel like this is the same song and dance that I dance to ALL THE FREAKING TIME!!! NO motivation. It is a viscous, terrible, absolute hardest circle that I have EVER had to KEEP pulling myself from. Some days it feels like I will NEVER make it to the healthy point. It seems soo far out of reach, then I just turn around and literally kill all of the hard work that took me WEEKS to take off. Then can you guess what I do then? Yup... eat even MORE out of emotion because I am soo down on myself for it.

But, this is where I think that I stand as of now. I have the winter blues, seasonal depression, cabin fever, whatever you call it. But that bug has bit me HARD! I live here in the great state of Michigan, and this has been a BRUTALLLLL winter. Like never ending! So cold that when you go outside and your nose hairs literally freeze. You have to let your car warm up (if it starts because it is too dang cold) for at least 15 mins for it to even warm up slightly. It forces you to stay inside. Then, after looking at the same four dang stupid walls, you go stir crazy. The only thing to do is cook and EAT. I eat even when I am not hungry. I eat just for SOMETHING to do. Then when I am done guess what I do. NOTHING. I sit my behind right on down. Over eating + no exercise = WEIGHT GAIN. HELLO NIKKI! THIS IS NOT ROCKET SCIENCE! So the question is WHYYY do I do this to myself?! Can you answer that for me please, because I have not a SLIGHTEST clue!

So, turning all this negative junk around to a little motivation!

Gonna try this today!

                                                                        source

 

Seriously! I wished I would have got this weight control under control such a long time ago.  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Sooo I so would've posted more inspiration crap but I have literally wasted about 40 mins of my time trying  to post more pics. Every single time I put in the http:// it gave me an error message. So I say the heck with it!! I did just look through my -weight loss- board on Pinterest and found lots of great inspiration that I had pinned from previous attempts. Check it HERE

Have a great weekend!! Stay warm if you are anywhere near the midwest/east coast.

XOXO

Made it!

Wheew! Made it through another Monday! Even though I stay home with my beautiful girls I still get the case of the Monday's. It is the day that I try and catch up on everything that I wasn't able to get to throughout the weekend. Monday is also the day that I sit down and make the grocery list out for Tuesday.

Speaking of groceries, I made a menu of 30 days of dinners! This is one of the best things that I have done! Seriously! Do you know how much stinkin' time I have wasted thinking, "uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh what should we have for dinner?" This is ALWAYS my husband's response, "I don't care." Thank you, thank you very much for that help Mr. Jonny boy! Ohh... I can't forget to mention my oldest response, "ICE CREAMMM!" Shoooot, only in my dreams is ice cream a healthy meal option. I bet it is in heaven! And I also bet that you can eat whatever the crap you want and not gain a pound. :)

So are ya wondering how I made that 30 day meal plan? Well wouldn'tcha know that I got a little inspiration from the mom/wife of like all time, Ms. Julie!! You can check out her blog here. Trust me, this is such a time saver. I can not tell you how luxurious it has been to KNOW what is for dinner. Usually before we were stuck on the same rotation of the same stuff. Not anymore! My husband even likes it this way. He will look at the week ahead and even pull out chicken or whatever out of the freezer to help prepare :) So I guess that makes up for not giving any meal ideas.

You are probably thinking, well it takes forever to do a weeks worth of meals so a month worth has to be LOTS longer. But, Julie over at Batcho's Family Adventures has the best strategy going. So here is the secret each day of the week is a "theme," for example, Monday is breakfast, Tuesday is crockpot, Wednesday is mexican etc. Then you just fill in meals for each theme. BOOM!

Now go to Julie's blog and get some more inspiration :)


XOXO

   

Buckin' Up

So today is like THE day all race fans dream about since the last race of the season..... the DAYTONA 500!! We get pretty excited about this 'round these parts. Did I fail to mention that Ima small town, country girl?! Well I am. I was raised on racing and enjoy it more than most women, even men.

We are kicking off the 2014 NASCAR season with a parrr-taaayy! While I am also excited as all get out, I am also dreading it too. I absolutely DESPISE it when I feel like this. It is like I am completely and utterly torn in half. I am super excited for the race and to mingle with other adults, but I also feel like I should just stay home and not go. There is going to be ALL bad food there, OTHER THAN what I am bringing. And I will be honest, it is the hardest thing to turn down that kind of food at this point in my journey. I get so mad at myself, because honestly, why am I experiencing this much anxiety over FOOD?

The other issue is seeing people that I haven't saw since I had a baby basically, maybe even before that. I feel soo down and out about my self image, that I honestly just want to stay home and not have to face them. I am embarrassed about myself. I can no longer hide behind a sweatshirt and feel ok. I always think that they are secertly saying "OMG! She still hasn't lost the baby weight, and the baby is almost 1!" Or "Wow she is a bigg girl!" Stupid right?! I know. Because when I look at people, I don't see their weight, I see them as a person. So what makes me think that they see me for my extra LBs that I am carrying?

So this is my game plan:
1. I am going to go anyways! I am buckin' up to this issue and not let it get in the way of life anymore. This is going to give me motivation to keep going. What I am doing is slowly working. The weight is slowly coming off. My confidence is slowly starting to come back.  I think that if I put myself out there it is going to drive me to work HARDER and make SMARTER decisions.

2.  I can not let food and other people's opinions take my life over. We are only on the beautiful planet for so long. Why run and hide from making memories that could last a lifetime with friends?

3.  I am bringing homemade hummus and fresh vegetables. At least there will be ONE healthy option.

4.  I am going to eat before I go over to the party. That way I am not going on an empty stomach and letting my taste buds and my lack of willpower get the best of me.

Decent game plan I think that I have if I say so myself. :)

I can not wait for the day that I look back and read this and it is all just a faint memory. Feeling like this is awful, I do not wish it on my worst enemy. I need to come right back to this very feeling every single time I want to cave and dig into a pie or cupcakes, or when I am eating simply because I am bored, or out of pure emotion.

I will conquer and come out on top! I am determined! I am capable! I deserve this!
(how's that for affirmations?!) 

Can't forget the..... 
BOOGITY BOOGITY BOOGITY!! LET'S GO RACIN'!!! 

What do you do when you have to go to an event that doesn't have much healthy (if any) food?

XOXO 

A little gun shy I suppose

I started this blog in the beginning of the year and made 1 post. ONE post people! What the heck am I doing? I feel very vulnerable putting my journey on a platform for everyone to read. But ya know what, if you are not doing something that scares the crap out of you, you're not really changing. That's what I keep telling myself anyways.

So here it goes!

I started this weight loss journey (AGAIN) the beginning of the year. I literally would look at myself in pictures and be DISGUSTED! It was as if I didn't know who that was. I don't know who I became. Before kids and marriage I worked, very hard and enjoyed spending time with family and friends and actually being a responsible adult. I have always had the weight battle. I do not think that's going to ever ever end. But, looking at those pictures, I honestly don't know who it was that I was looking at. She looked uncomfortable in her own skin, she looked lost, she looked guarded, sad, and ready to hid behind a big ol tree. I sit back and try to reflect on how I got here so that I can make the RIGHT changes. Sure you can diet and lose the weight, but if you are not FIXING the internal problem, you will just find yourself right back to square one! Which, I have done more times than I can count.

I know that I have put myself and my marriage on the complete back burner when I had kids. After gaining weight with the first baby it really did some good damage to my self confidence and it was almost immediately I put up a wall. One day I found myself calling out for help from a dark hole and then I started to pull myself out by making more time for ME, and my husband, and focused more on me and getting healthy. It was almost like the difference I felt was night and day. I remember thinking that the time we spent away from our daughter then (of course was never more than a night) was having an amazing impact. I felt like I was something MORE than a mommy, and the cleaner of the house, and the folder and put awayer of the laundry. I was being ME, the me that I have seemed to have left behind. The me before my I was so lucky to be blessed with my sweet daughter Ali. I also made it a focus to start to lose the weight, so once I actually stepped out of mommy mode and became me again, I started to get comments on my weight loss. THAT IS THE MOST GRATIFYING AND ENCOURAGEMENT TO KEEP GOING! So I did. Sure I had my days or even weeks when somehow lots and lots chocolate would find itself in my mouth. But I believe that I was a down a total of 21 lbs or something. Which was just a chip off the iceburg. I still had lots to go. Then..... dun da dunnnn.... I found out I was pregnant again!!! I literally stopped nursing my 1st baby and less than 3 months later I was pregnant!! Annnd I found myself right back in that same cycle. When you read this, please do not get this confused, I LOOVVVE MY GIRLS MORE THAN LIFE ITSELF! I would NOT change a single thing, ever, ever, ever! I do not despise them or anything like that. My little family is my whole entire world! I am now coming off of nursing my littlest one and I am using my family as my inspiration to get healthy, once and for all!

So my new years resolutions are these:
1. Make time to be an adult with and without my husband.
2. Weight loss - 60 lbs this year
3. RUN! I want to be one of those people you see out running, and ...gasp.... actually liking it!
4. Fix up this dang ol house to put on the market for next year.
5. Celebrate life more. It's the small things really.
6. Help and inspire others to become the best they can be.

I have more, I am sure I do. I need to start making lists. Maybe that should have been on the new years resolution :)

I want to hear from ya, what are your struggles? What is your new years resolutions and have you been working on them?!?

XO
Moma Born

Hello Out There

Wow! I can not believe that I did it?! I actually made a blog! I have been wanting to do this for such a long time now. Now that I have one, I don't even know where to begin?

Good place to start is my name, right?! Well, I'm Nikki. I am a little hometown girl living in the mitten. I am a stay at home mommy to the two cutest little girls that I have ever saw in my life, and a wife to a pretty good looking husband too. I am in search for the real me. For the me that I am ment to be. Please do not take this the wrong way, but my kids and husband do not define me. Do not get me wrong, they mean the absolute world to me. I would do anything and give anything for their happiness and well being. I just feel that since I put school on hold and quit my job to stay at home, that being a wife and mom is WHAT I am and WHO I am. I KNOW that I am wayy more than that. I am in quest to find the old me and the new me and somehow, someway merge those two together.

I consider myself pretty crafty. Sometimes more than others. I enjoy home decor and DIY. I struggle personally with self esteem, weight, finding time for just myself and for me and my husband, and so so much more. I made this blog so I could document my journey. I want it to be a mostly positive blog because I mean who wants to read (and write) a lame, downer blog? So I hope that I can inspire someone to become the best YOU that you can become. I hope you enjoy reading and following my journey.  :)